Being put out to Grasse

Being put out to grass is a term from the horse racing world; it means that a racehorse is being retired. I’m neither a racehorse nor retired but I had the dubious pleasure of having to go to Grasse a few times in the last few months. An hours bus ride through the Provençal hills will take you to this town, famous for its perfumes and infamous for its Sous Prefecture that issues the driving licences. (I’m not the only one who has run into trouble with this institution.)

In August my purse was stolen. Annoying but bank cards where easily blocked and replaced. More problematic was the stolen UK driving licence as it can't be issued to a foreign address. After some phone calls and internet research I put myself out to Grasse in search of a French licence.

Visit one, august: A very friendly lady assured me I was best to come back on the 15^th of September as they were making changes to the licence and my paperwork would just be left on a pile in the office until then.

Visit two, September: A not so friendly lady took great pleasure in tearing up my carefully filled out forms as they were filled out in blue biro instead of black. She then pushed all my other papers back over the counter saying I needed a copy of the police report regarding the stolen purse.

Visit three, Late September: A friendly gentleman told me the proof of address I provided was now a week out of date, before pushing the papers back over the counter.

Visit Four, October: Everything checked and double checked I handed my papers over with trepidation. All seemed fine until the clerk got to my UK declaration of a clean licence. Some eyebrows were frowned and managers consulted. Then the whole bunch of papers got pushed back again with the remark that this was not the right declaration. (Really, I had seen you 3 times before and now you tell me!) The poor civil servant at the DVLA suffered the brunt of my frustration as how dare they send me the wrong declaration. The lady assured me that each local authority in France has different rules. The UK issues 2 different declarations and soon I would be in possession of both.

Visit Five, November: Not without trepidation I handed the pile of papers over to the clerk. I held my breath as each sheet was scrutinised. She nodded and started tapping away on her computer, a few minutes later I held a provisional French licence in my hands. It is silly the things that make us punch the air in triumph, but this certainly did. Pfew, this racehorse can retire now, at least until the next run in with officialdom.   

Ex-pat

Maybe if I had moved here in my 20’s instead of my 40’s I would have been fluent in French and have integrated in local live. This isn’t the first time I’ve immigrated to a different country. I moved to Scotland from my native Holland when I was in my early 20’s. Being young, single and scared of nothing I picked up the local habits and customs easily; after a few years I felt more British than Dutch. Is it the fact that I’m older, married and less courageous now that I’m not integrating that easily or is it that French culture is just less accessible than Anglo-Saxon culture? 

Even here in France where they put in a lot of effort to retain their language and culture, for instance by limiting the amount of non-French language songs that can be played on the radio, you see more and more that Anglo-Saxon culture is taking over. The latest series from the USA are as eagerly watched here as elsewhere in Europe. More and more English is sneaking into the language, often its use is bemusing. For instance a Macdonald Big Mac meal deal is described as Best of big Mac. (Which bits are they leaving out? Is it just the pickle and the burger?)

In the book Cameron is making fun of English George as he hasn’t fully adapted to French life and he is certainly not an unusual example of an expat in the south of France and although I have put in a lot of effort in, I am resigning myself to the fact that I’m more like George than I’d like to admit. I have caught myself moaning about the quality of tea. The same brand of English tea just taste different here. Even with the right tea bags it is a rubbish cuppa as the water is so hard. I have to decalcify my kettle every two weeks. Yes I’m doing very badly at being French, considering how riled up I get about the quality of a cup of tea.

Half arsed

I decided to make some changes in my life as doing things half-arsed is never a good thing. Firstly there was the book promotion. After receiving an email from Amazon-KDP about their new feature to reduce your book for a limited time. I thought great idea, let's put that into place in the 20min I have before I have to catch the 8.10 to Monaco. Pleased with my new plan I posted the usual link to Amazon.co.uk everywhere. Now on my day off I read the offer more closely and I can only do this offer to Amazon.com or Amazon.uk.co, but not both. Already having set it up I decided to repost all the info with the correct link. And feel free to reblog this:

My book at the reduced price from the 8th till the 14th is only available on Amazon.com at $0.99. You can find it via the following correct link:
http://www.amazon.com/Language-blood-Angela-lockwood-ebook/dp/B00EMEN1P6/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1383640942&sr=8-1&keywords=angela+lockwood

I've also decided to quit my job as I'm not really enjoying it and frankly I'm more tired after my day off than before it. Often walking around like a Zombie uttering barely comprehensible french phrases. I've re-negotiated my contract down to the end of the year and I'm looking forwards to devoting myself fully to writing and promoting. One of the reasons we moved to France was to get a better quality of life, to enjoy the sun and all the other fine things the south of France has to offer. Working 40 hours with a hefty commute and no thanks certainly doesn't fit with that philosophy!

$0.99

KDP select has added this new feature where you can reduce the price of your book for a set time, while still keeping your percentage of royalties. I decided to give it a try and will be reducing the price of my book to $0.99 from the 8^th until the 14^th of November. So if you haven’t bought the book yet, now is the time to do it. If you have bought the book and liked it; please share it on your blog or Facebook page and tell your friends. I have been told by many people that they thought it was very funny. I’m hoping a reduced price will result in some reviews too.

I’m very new at the publishing game and at the moment I’m experimenting with different promotions. It’s exiting as I have no idea how this will go, but I’m looking forwards to seeing some data at the end of the promotion. Here is the link to Amazon:

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Language-in-the-blood-ebook/dp/B00EMEN1P6/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1377328658&sr=1-1&keywords=angela+lockwood

Happy reading……

Catch 22

Last week I got my first royalty cheque, not very large but very exiting none the less. Like many writers you have this dream of releasing this first book and then royalties just roll in. They don’t, there is just too much choice out there for your book to get noticed without some serious promotion and networking.

Here then is the catch 22, to write I need a steady income and inspiration. My job in Monaco provides me with both. But what do you do with money if you don’t get the time to pursue your dream and frankly enjoy life. Should I be foolish and just leave my job to concentrate on writing and promoting without ever making it big, but have a whale of a time doing it until the pennies run out? Or should I just keep getting on that 8.10 train and be a responsible adult. When I took this job it ticked all the right boxes on paper, but 2 1/2 months in it is turning out to be a nightmare. I know what Cameron would do; he would have management for dinner and run off with the day’s takings and stock! 

Watch this space.....